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    Sonya Grade 1/3

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    Shini Chikai
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    Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Shini Chikai on Mon May 22, 2017 6:48 pm

    Name: Combat Knife
    Owner: @Kasey
    Type: Weapon
    Rank: Weak
    Description: A small blade that is used for battle like in war or for more ultility purposes like camping. It's small and compact made for easy travel, or easy hiding.
    Spoiler:
    Length: Eight inches
    Weight: 1 lbs
    Strengths:
    - Deals D-Ranked damage.
    - Can be used to cut people or ties/ropes
    Weaknesses:
    - Durability of 2 D-Spell hits/5 weak hits
    - Can be stolen
    - Can't protect from spells
    Ability: N/a


    Last edited by Shini Chikai on Sat May 27, 2017 8:37 pm; edited 2 times in total


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Fetus on Sun Oct 29, 2017 2:14 pm



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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Shane on Sun Oct 29, 2017 5:48 pm

    First of all, can be used for a variety of purposes is too vague as a strength. What purposes specifically is it used for?

    Secondly, id like to see a bit more description than a picture and one sentence in the description section (I know I'm more picky than some)

    Third, that weight seems to be a bit light for a knife of that size, I looked it up and an average weight for a knife of that size is closer to 1 lb.

    4th: I'd like to see one more strength and weakness please.

    @Fetus


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Fetus on Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:00 pm

    "But its 2 weakness and 3 strengths?"


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Shane on Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:10 pm

    Whoops forgot that, ignore that, but regardless, the other edits need to be made. It should not be 1 "pund" for weight, but rather listed as 1 lb. Secondly, "a small blade" in the description is redundant, you already mentioned that in the other sentence. Third, if you are going to keep that " a small blade" sentence fix you capitalization and punctuation and move it to where the other description sentence is to avoid confusion and make it easier to read. Ability should be N/A, not none.

    @Fetus


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Fetus on Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:34 pm

    bump


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Shane on Sun Oct 29, 2017 6:38 pm

    N/A should have a / between the letters, not just listed as na. Move one of the description sentences to one side of the spoiler, top or bottom, pick one but they need to be together to make it easier to read. Remove the s from the end of lbs. Bump when completed the edits.


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Fetus on Sun Oct 29, 2017 8:03 pm

    Bump


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Shane on Sun Oct 29, 2017 8:25 pm

    The slash in n/a is the wrong way and there needs to be a gap between the description text and the part of the template saying Description:


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Fetus on Mon Oct 30, 2017 2:40 pm

    bump


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Shane on Mon Oct 30, 2017 3:15 pm

    Approved.


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    Re: Sonya Grade 1/3

    Post by Fetus on Mon Oct 30, 2017 4:50 pm

    The app itself is perfect, good job. . . (only flaw is measurement, it would be PERFECT if handle/blade. not just overall.)

    The only issue is your grading. You want to nitpick every little typo. You need to be prepared to do a lot of the little things yourself. A lot of people are stupid, and dragging out grading doesn't help either side.

    Also to quote the app and highlight the errors makes it easier.

    OKAY

    (3 More apps until promotion)


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      Current date/time is Tue Dec 12, 2017 5:57 am